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As people working in the Veterinary industry, we are dealing with / working with dozens of people every day. Some of them are ‘new’ people and others are existing clients already.
In the short period of time that we have with them and in order to get the most desirable outcome for their pet, it is critical that we build trust and credibility – almost instantly.
What most people fail to realize is that how we communicate nonverbally often speaks louder than words. As humans, it’s natural for us to subconsciously try to read and decode the people around us.
There are three common body language mistakes people make that cause others to perceive them as a dishonest or untrustworthy person.
Research has found that we have dedicated regions of the brain that instantly recognize and observe the hands of those we communicate with. What you do with your hands is critical when it comes to first impressions. It also plays a major role in how much influence you’re able to have over others.
If your hands are hidden under a table or stiffly placed inside your pockets or are perhaps ‘hidden’ by a clipboard or some charts, it can be challenging for the other person to process your intention. This can make you come across as dishonest or uncomfortably searching for distractions.
Also, beware that studies have found that a clenched fist is a negative nonverbal cue.
Researchers at the American Psychological Association found that humans tend to close their fists when they feel threatened or sense conflict. (Imagine a woman clutching her purse or a man grabbing the arms of his chair.)
Always keep your hands visible, relaxed and expressive. Great clients with your hands out and open, perhaps with a small wave or handshake.
Many experts suggest keeping your hands open, with your palms at a 45-degree angle. This communicates to the other person that you are open and honest.
When communicating a large concept (when talking with a client or in a meeting, for instance), use hand gestures that reach beyond the outline of your body to show authority and certainty. It will also help you to explain your ideas more robustly.
Do you subconsciously touch your necklace, tie or shirt collar? Bite your nails? Play with your hair? These little actions are called ‘self-soothing’ gestures.
It’s reminiscent of when we were babies and our parents would gently rub our backs or heads to calm us.
As adults, we still engage in these behaviours as a way to lower our anxiety. In situations where we feel nervous or anxious, for example, we might do things like:
While these behaviours may be a result of habit, perhaps of boredom, as a nervous tick or a way to release extra energy, they still encode nervousness, low self-esteem, doubt or worst of all, deceit.
In other words – it makes clients less likely to trust us, believe in us and therefore less likely to take up our recommendations – and that’s definitely NOT what we want!
Before any client meeting or conversation that might make you feel nervous or uncomfortable, self-soothe yourself in private.
Shake it out by listening to your favourite song or go into the bathroom and slowly rub the back of your neck and arms. These activities will instil calmness before you ‘make an entrance’.
Are you really happy your colleague received a raise or was promoted? Are you really overjoyed about your in-law’s visit next month?
Often, we pretend to be happy as a social lubricant. We attempt to hide fear, sadness, jealousy or any other negative emotion behind feigned happiness.
Here’s the wild part: Fake happiness and real happiness look different on the face.
Facial expressions, also known as “microexpressions,” are the window to the soul. When someone is genuinely happy, their cheeks and the wrinkles on the sides of their eyes (crow’s feet) appear engaged and lifted. This is called a Duchenne smile. Whereas with a fake happiness expression, the muscles on the side of the eye are less engaged, and the jaw muscles are less visible.
Fake smiles can be spotted a mile away. At the Science of People – a human behaviour research lab led by Vanessa van Edwards, they put fake smiles to the test through their virtual Body Language Quiz.
In one question, where participants were shown a genuine smile hidden among three fake smiles, about 87 per cent of participants were able to spot the genuine smile.
Don’t try to fake it ’til you make it.
Honour your authentic emotions and don’t hide behind fake happiness. If you’re not happy about something, it’s better to let the other person know, rather than try to ‘indirectly’ lie about it through the use of FAKE micro-expressions. The other person will instantly be able to tell exactly how you feel.
These three tips are easy to implement and immediately actionable in practice. Go For It and ENJOY.
On graduation I purchased a Veterinary clinic in Maitland, NSW and sold it in July 2009. At the time of purchase, it was a run down one person clinic with about a 90% mixed and 10% small animal component. The business grew well, so that at one stage there were 4 branches and 8 Veterinarians. At the time of sale there were 5 Veterinarians, 16 support staff functioning out of a purpose built ‘A’ class Hospital with one branch. In 2004 the practice won the Pfizer/AVA Practice of Excellence Award as well as coming 3rd in the Fujitsu Customer Service Awards. At this stage (and even slightly before), I started co-presenting at trainings and workshops and in 2007 I started developing and hosting my own workshops. In July 2009 I sold my practice so as to be able to concentrate fully on my coaching, training, speaking and workshop business – and to be able to move to Exeter (NSW) to be with my partner. I missed clinical practice, so in May 2018 I purchased a veterinary practice with the aim of building it up by providing a highly customer service friendly veterinary practice alternative to the local community. In 12m...
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